MARRIAGE IS A BEAUTIFUL THING

 

Marriage is a very beautiful thing. Marriage can build you or even break you to pieces so you need to be careful before going into it. Marriage is the union of two different people from different background of different mindset coming together to become one so it is very good to marry someone you truly love. The love you feel for that person will make you go through trials with that person and both of you can’t survive through anything and marriage can't survive forever on leftovers. It needs to be fed continually or it will eventually starve so you need to always work on your marriage.

WORK ON YOUR MARRIAGE

Getting married is easy; living together successfully is hard. So how do you do it? By identifying issues that must be resolved, working on them, and learning to live with the rest!

How should you handle conflicts when they arise? (1) Attack the problem instead of each other. (2) Keep your voice low, stay calm, and your partner is more likely to pay attention. (3) Choose the best time to address the issue, not when the kids are hungry or you're both tired. (4) Remember, men and women see things differently. So, when your spouse expresses their point of view, don't sigh and roll your eyes. What marriage therapists refer to as 'active listening', calls for affirming your spouse through paraphrasing, validation and positive feedback. (5) There will be times when each of you will have to compromise. (6) Choose your words carefully. By having all this in mind you can go through any stages of marriage.

 

THE DIFFERENT STAGES OF A MARRIAGE.

1. THE AMAZEMENT STAGE

This is the "wow" stage. Lots of new things to discover with your spouse. The newness, the freshness is so amazing. Sleeping on the same bed, wearing the same attire, cooking for him, doing house chores with her, bathing together. Wearing your dazzling wedding ring everywhere, turning people's head at the newest couple around. Loads and lots of fun. Sexual exploration and excitement. Being in control of your kitchen, feeding him and lots more. It's the honeymoon stage and it's so so beautiful.

 

2. THE IRRITATION STAGE

This is when you begin to notice weaknesses you have overlooked or blissfully wish they go away but didn't. The repetition of such weaknesses begins to work on your nerves and you are getting irritated: he snores a lot, she is slow in the kitchen, she belches loudly, he screams unnecessarily, she won't bathe before coming to bed or shave, he spends many hours watching football and ignores you when you talk. "What's just wrong with this guy?" You think aloud, well it's part of marriage.

 

3. THE ANGER STAGE

This is when the repetition of such weaknesses gets on your nerves and you display your anger.

The introverted partners stuffs it in and either keep malice, avoid you or stubbornly continue with the irritating habit. It's the stage you begin to wonder: "have I really married the wrong guy?" "Have I married the wrong woman?" No, you did not, you are simply going through a phase together.

 

 

4. THE RESOLUTION STAGE

 When you both begin to face the reality of marriage and acknowledge your partner's weaknesses. You eventually realize anger and malice does not solve any problem and begins to find ways to deal with your differences, both of you begin to compromise here and there and adjust to each other.

 

5. THE ACCEPTANCE STAGE

When it dawned on you that some things are just part of your partner and may never change. You resigned from anger, abuse and quarrel and choose to accept them, lovingly adjust to them and enjoy them regardless of their weaknesses.

 

6. THE RESTFUL STAGE

 This is the stage you permanently accept them with all their strengths, weaknesses, short comings and flaws and love them unconditionally regardless of what they do.This is real love-agape, divine and true. You reconnect emotionally, spiritually and physically at a deeper level and enjoy honey moon again while building a lasting marriage regardless of the challenges you face.

There is no perfect marriage.

 Every marriage goes through this stages.

 

How you handle it will determine if you will come out bitter or better.

You don't have to abuse your spouse or keep malice if God is at the centre of your home and you obey the word of God daily.

 Nevertheless, do not be disappointed if you go through the unpleasant stages in marriage. It is a phase and will surely end.

 

Handle your marriage with wisdom and keep loving regardless of the challenges you face.

That is what will make your marriage a heaven on earth experience. Many of us are vulnerable In our marriages yet we believe if we leave, where will we go to and what will people say?

There are many people unhappy with their relationships yet they cannot find the courage to speak up or ask for help. I can tell you from personal experience that no matter the sacrifice or your effort, if your spouse doesn't want you, there is nothing you can do. He/she is going to make your life a leaving hell. You need to be in a marriage that your partner love and respect you, you will be able to work things out together.

 

Marriage is a very beautiful thing. Don’t be afraid of going into even if you’ve seen a lot of people with problems in their marriage and even divorce, don’t compare other people marriage with your own because a lot can be hidden under a fake smile and even a lot people can do anything to keep their marriage even when they are not happy.

 

Think about it

You can chat with privately on my facebook page (marriage and relationship Advice) or fill the contact and send me an email. Am always ready to listen to you.